Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Lessons from a Child: Fun with sticks

It's a gorgeous day and I want to stretch my legs and clear my head in the fresh air.

And my son has a new hobby. Just in time for spring.

He has traded his little blue snow shovel for a couple of sticks and twigs. With his sticks, he scrapes at the ground, bangs on the porch posts and fence railings, and pokes at the melting snow piles. He LOVES playing with sticks!

It turns out that sticks are almost everywhere. And the places you can't find sticks naturally, my son imports them. Despite my attempts to the contrary, sticks (and twigs) can now be found in the living room, the car, the grocery store, and my shoes. "Sticks go outside," I say repeatedly. On a weekly basis, I'm removing a sufficient number of sticks from our dwelling and vehicle, enough to make a small campfire.

When we head out the door, he goes right for the sticks and then over to the fast-disappearing snow mound to make patterns in the snow. And due to his new found obsession with sticks, my daily walk is virtually a thing of a past.

So I am forced to find a balance between patience and impatience, a harmony between allowing and accomplishing, a peace ... oh, who am I kidding? It's driving me nuts!

Just when I'm itching to really get a good walk in, he finds a stick and proceeds to stand there playing with sticks (for hours, if I let him). Ugh, ugh, ugh.

Transitions with a toddler strikes again!

But how do I know if what I'm giving him is enough? And by "enough", I mean understanding, compassion, and playtime with sticks.

I try to stand where he stands.

From his point of view, he gets imprisoned in a stroller for the duration of Mommy's walk. Plus the urge to play with sticks is strong and almost undeniable.

After all, playing with sticks seems to be an activity loved by most children, especially boys. [I have a theory that this fascination with sticks is leftover from cave man days when men carried big sticks in order to protect themselves from attack (possibly from a saber tooth tiger). And my little cave boy and other little cave boys are living from that particular genetic memory.]

From my point of view, I n-e-e-d a walk. Emphasis on the need.

So I make sure he has snacks, water, and attention. Plus, we take turns pointing out fun stuff like dogs and cats and the occasional squirrel. And we usually make a stop at the playground and park (where there are plenty of sticks). And he gets other opportunities during the day to play with sticks.

So (just like all relationships) we work to find a compromise and soothe the caveboy and his mommy. *smile* And most days, we are finding fun with sticks.

Friday, March 26, 2010

Children & spirit contact

Q: How can you tell if it's a young child's imagination or if they are actually seeing the spirit of a loved one? How do you encourage them to speak about it?

A: Many children seem to go through phases where they report seeing or sensing spirit people. And my clients frequently report that their children have seen spirit loved ones.

In fact, a client recently stated, "My son who is four years old told me that my father often visits him. He describes him accurately and calls him 'Grandpa' and has conversations with him. My father died five years before my son was born. I like knowing that my Dad is looking out for my son."

Typically after a child has perceived the spirit of a loved one, they may describe the spirit's physical appearance or call them by name. When paging through the family album, they may point to a picture of your grandmother and say, "That's the woman who visits me." These are identifiers of proof of spirit contact.

Also, the child may share information that they could not have known. They might say, "Grandma told me that such-and-such happened when you were eight." And you will recall the event.

When dealing with a child who is perceiving spirit, it is important to be natural about it. Here's a list of DOs and DO NOTs:
  • Do not interrogate the child. You may have questions, but ask them gently. The child may not know the answer or be able to express it.
  • Do not act afraid or fearful or overly excited about the child's mediumship abilities.
  • Be patient. Allow them to share in their own time and their own way.
  • Keep your child's trust.
  • Do not tell your friends and family that "Johnny talks to dead people".
  • Do not make them perform on command. Do not make them into a show pony. Allow the child to be a child.
  • Do not page through the family album pointing at every picture and asking your child "Is this the person who visits you?" to the point the child becomes bored or frustrated.
  • Know that every child develops at a different rate. And a child's level of ability and spirit communication may go through phases. For example, they may report visits from Grandma when they are age three and then nothing until age 11 and and then nothing until age 32.
  • Let go of your expectations and allow your child's abilities to unfold in Divine Right Timing and Divine Right Order.
If the child expresses interest in understanding and developing his/her mediumship abilities, foster the child's growth in a developmentally appropriate time and way. They must be allowed to mature physically, emotionally, and mentally first. Mediumship development circles usually accept adult students (from age 18 to 108) for those reasons.

Consult with a medium or spiritual counselor who you trust. In a session, many of your concerns and questions may be answered. This will allow you (as the parent, grandparent, or guardian) to better know YOUR role in the child's development.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Sunday speaker at COLS church service 3-28-2010

This Sunday, I will be the Featured Speaker and Medium at the Church of the Living Spirit. *** As far as my topic goes ... it is taking form and shape still, but I have it almost crystallized.

For those of you who are not familiar with a Spiritualist church service, here is a basic outline of events:

  • Lecture from the featured speaker (me, this Sunday)
  • Healing time - opportunity to receive beautiful, channeled energy from one of the healers
  • Messages from Spirit - demonstrations of mediumship are presented by the medium (me, again!) giving short messages to those in the audience
  • Music - songs with live music accompaniment

So there you go! If you are coming to church, you will see me and I will get to personally wish you "Happy Spring!"

*** = My home church! I've been speaking at and serving at this church for almost 15 years. Sunday morning church services are held at the Assembly Hall in Lily Dale, NY at 10:30 a.m.

For more info, visit http://www.willawhite.com/ and http://www.churchofthelivingspiritlilydale.com/.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Lessons from a Child: Synchronized swinging

The sky is a brilliant blue. The sun is shining. I hear birds chirping merrily. Snow drops and green grasses are peeking out from melting piles of snow. Spring is here!

After a winter of snowshoveling and living in a Fortress of Solitude, the past two weeks have been heavenly. Fifty and sixty degree temperatures have a way of bringing out neighbors and friends and brightening everybody's day.

It's time to play outside!

The playground slides, swings, and seesaws are not full of snow, so my son and I walk to the playground. Other kids are already there climbing on the tire swing, crawling through the tunnel, and running toward the slides. They must have heard the call of the playground too.

My son (the youngest one at the playground) watches the activity and wanders around the equipment to observe the older kids. Occasionally, he joins in, but he seems more interested in exploring the basketball court and playing peekaboo with me in the trees. But from time to time, I get a chance to observe the other kids.

A pair of little boys are climbing as high as they can on the equipment. They have binoculars and are speaking in "us versus them" terms. "Three girls coming right this way. Don't talk to them," instructs one of the boys in serious tones. They are pretending (or halfpretending) to be like men on a covert military mission as they jump off the steps and duck behind the slide.

The three girls move from the seesaw to the tireswing. The older two are helping the younger girl to twirl. Happy laughter bubbles.

A mother is teaching her daughters to swing. Her youngest girl is cuddled on her lap and the older one is perched on her own swing. "Move your legs forward and back. Forward and back," she instructs her daughters, her own legs pumping.

The three girls now shift from the tireswing to the regular swings until they are situated next to the mother and her daughters. They join in on the swinging lesson. "Forward and back," they chant.

Eventually, they are all swinging in tandem (the mother, the daughters, and the three girls). Their legs pump forward perfectly in sync. Together they experience a wonderful few moments of harmony and joyful swinging. Smiles and quiet pride are on their faces at their synchronized swinging and united momentum.

As I resume playing peekaboo with my son, I have a different smile on my face too. Looking over at those girls, I could feel their joy of the moment, their glee. I am glad that I had the opportunity to witness their harmony and teamwork.

In the sunshine of today at the children's playground, I am reminded of simple pleasures and the joy of synchronized energy.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Earth-bound spirits

Q: Hi Willa, I often come across the term "earth-bound spirits." Do you believe there is an evolutionary "slowdown" with such spirits and what do you think compels them so?

A: Earth-bounds spirits. Some people call these ghosts.

First, let me say --- I have been a professional medium for over a decade, so I connect with spirits regularly. That does not mean that I label myself a ghostbuster, a ghosthunter, paranormal investigator, or an exorcist. There are others who specialize in those pursuits.

Regarding "earth-bound spirits", I personally believe that spirits do NOT haunt people and places to the extent that Hollywood would have us believe. Most suspected hauntings turn out to be attributable to non-spirit events, such as air currents and overactive imaginations.

Instead of "hauntings", I encourage you to think in terms of "visitations". Spirits might visit us, but generally they don't stay around long as they have other things to do. See where are they blogpost for more clarification.

Also, sometimes what people are feeling in a so-called 'haunting' is energy buildup from a past event. Using a technique called psychometry, you can feel the energy of a person, a place, or an object. Intuitively, most of us do this anyway when we meet someone or walk into a room. Some past events can cause an intense long-lasting energy residue that some people become aware of and assume they are feeling a person who has passed over.

But back to earthbound spirits ... in my experience, this is rare. And I mean, rare. From time to time, a soul will be confused temporarily, but the evolutionary slowdown usually began during their lifetime on the physical plane.

Here are some possible reasons for their temporary confusion:

  • they are afraid that their bad actions will result in punishment of their soul in the afterlife
  • they don't 'believe' in an afterlife and they are trying desperately to maintain that illusion
  • they wish to remain on the Earth plane because of strong emotional attachments to people and/or places and they don't fully understand yet that they can continue to enjoy wonderful and fulfilling connections with those people and/or places as a Spirit (for some, this may be because of points one and/or two as stated above)

They have lost their sense of direction temporarily. Notice that I keep using the words "temporary" and "temporarily". Each soul does find the light. Eventually, like homing pigeons we all return home. We rediscover our Divine Home, our Divine Light. After all, spiritual progression is eternal and infinite.

Some people "get it"/understand this faster than others. What this means is that awareness of spiritual connection plays a big role in an individual's state of Divine consciousness and therefore in their understanding of so-called Death.

[A special note about sudden traumatic passings: Just because a person passes suddenly and/or traumatically does not mean that they don't know they are 'dead'.]


If you have a general question whose answer would benefit many people, you may submit a question any time and watch for the answer in this Blog. Email me at willawhite@hotmail.com.

I am unable to answer emails that involve requests for feedback or personal advice about a situation. If you would like guidance in your spiritual or intuitive development, please book a consultation with me, and if you need to connect with a loved one in Spirit, please book a reading.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Lessons from a Child: Spiritual homework

Recently, my son (age 17 months) was sick for the first time in his life. He experienced a cold --- complete with runny nose, cough, low-grade fever, and more.

He was miserable! I could see he was overwhelmed by this new feeling we call 'a cold'. At times, he would look at me desperately as if to say, "Why am I feeling this way, Mommy? My nose won't stop snotting and my throat hurts and I can't breathe well. I'm hurting, I ache all over, and nothing feels right. Help me!!!"

Watching him suffer was absolutely horrible for me. He is normally a very healthy little boy. Before this, when he needed something (such as food, diaper, teething, attention, etc) I figured out how to meet his needs. But this cold was something else entirely. It pushed all my mother bear buttons and the desire to protect and nurture my cub was paramount.

I would wipe his red-raw nose (as gently as possible) and cuddle him close, encouraging him to relax and occasionally play. He nursed and napped frequently with spurts of energy, followed by painful lethargy and coughing. My poor little guy!

It was painful for me (the mommy) to watch him struggle and suffer. My heart would get tight in my chest and I would think "He's so little. Let me suffer for him."

And my soul would immediately respond, "This is part of his journey. You can't do someone else's spiritual homework for them."

This got me thinking about how we sometimes feel compelled to take on another person's journey. We must distinguish between lightening the load with the occasional helping hand AND doing it for them.

Especially if something keeps happening with them again and again, and you find yourself saying "I just fixed that for them!", consider that you are not the one who is supposed to 'fix it' for them.

Each person has spiritual lessons that they are here to experience and learn from. If they don't learn from the lesson (or someone tries to do it for them), the lesson is repeated until they have completed it. This is part of Spiritual Natural Law, especially the Law of Karma and the Law of Personal Responsibility.

Bottomline: You cannot take on someone else's lesson for them. You can love them and support them, but you can't do it for them. Allowing your loved ones to learn and experience is important for their soul growth.

That's a lesson that I was reminded of during my son's bout with his first cold. Perhaps it is a lesson for you too.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Instant Mashed Potatoes

Most mediumship students are eager to rapidly progress through their development. They are brimming with questions and enthusiasm, thirsty to soak up knowledge and experiences. I love their excitement and enjoy being part of their journey.

Occasionally, I come across students who want all their questions answered right now --- they are impatient and they don't want to wait to learn the answers for themselves at the developmentally appropriate time for them.

As a result, they are expecting a year or two of studying (or sometimes just a few workshops) to make them into a bonafide medium. I call this instant mashed potatoes thinking. Sure you can add water, stir, and you have instant mashed potatoes --- but they TASTE awful!

Like most good things in life, REAL mashed potatoes take time --- you have to wash, peel, & cut the potatoes, then boil them in water for a while, drain the water, mash them up, add butter, milk, salt & pepper for creamy texture and flavor. Then, you have some GREAT TASTING mashed potatoes. The process takes longer, but it's worth it!

I do feel that it is possible for some people to progress rapidly and well. This is where right practice and intention come into play. If you wish to be a good professional medium, it is important to cultivate good mediumship habits, have patience regarding your progress, and keep awareness of the sacred part of you strong.

So keep this in mind as you make your choices for learning and practicing mediumship.

Friday, March 5, 2010

Class: Parts of the Soul

On Tuesday March 9th, I will be the Guest Presenter for the Tuesday Night Circle at the Church of the Living Spirit Church in Lily Dale NY. [My home church! *smile* I've been speaking at and serving at this church for almost 15 years.]

This weekly development class is geared toward beginning and intermediate students of mediumship. Class lasts approximately two hours and there is usually a different guest presenter and topic each week. No set fee to attend, love donation.

Here is a basic outline of events:

  • Teachings from the featured speaker (me, this Tuesday)
  • Meditation - brief guided meditation
  • Messages from Spirit - opportunity for students to give & receive short messages from spirit loved ones

My topic is the Parts of the Soul. I will be discussing the merging of the soul with the body during gestation, as well as the main parts of the soul consciousness. Emphasis will focus on what various spiritual teachings tell us about the parts of the soul and HOW the parts of the soul facilitate mediumship development.

So there you go! If you are coming to the Tuesday night circle, you will see me.

For more info, visit http://www.willawhite.com/ and http://www.churchofthelivingspiritlilydale.com/.

Monday, March 1, 2010

Spiritual progression is eternal and infinite

Sometimes clients will express surprise that their loved ones in Spirit are progressing, especially if they had a 'bad' experience with them. Every situation is different, but here are some scenarios.

"Are you telling me that my father, a truly evil despicable man when he was here, is becoming spiritually aware now?" Yes.

"So you are saying my mother, who ignored me and was unloving in so many ways, realizes that she loves me and is saying she wants to be loving toward me at this moment?" Yes.

"My son, who committed suicide because of his manic depression and drug problem, who cut me out of his life, is apologizing for his actions? And he is seeking a higher spiritual way of life?" Yes.

Many times, those in Spirit will indicate their increasing spiritual awareness, discuss their understanding of events during their lifetime as spiritual lessons, and take responsibility for their actions and reactions.

Whatever state of spiritual consciousness a person has when they pass, they take that with them. And they learn and grown from there.

Spiritual awareness doesn't come with a snap of the fingers. Mostly, it takes time to assimilate a new way of thinking and being. For some, it takes time to accept love in its purest form, and to allow judgement and hurt to drop away.

Life review plays a major role in assisting souls in understanding their role and the roles of others. They are given the opportunity to see and perceive events in a new and loving light. This key to letting go of emotional walls and blockades, to cutting thru all the hurt feelings.

Sometimes what we are experiencing in a mediumship reading with a Spirit loved one is the first petals of the soul opening to Love and Divine Consciousness. As new spaces become open in a soul, love blooms and love is given to the key people that the soul interacted with during their lifetime. Any love withheld, flows abundantly. Any love given, amplifies.

There is not a set time limit for life review. It's not like a soul is given six months to 'graduate' or they get kicked out. A soul's review of life takes however long it takes. (In fact, to talk about 'time' is kind of ridiculous because time doesn't really exist the way most of us perceive it here on the physical plane. But that's another conversation...) Basically, without a time limit, we have eternity to come to a better understanding of our soul's potential energy and our soul's limitless energy and love.

With eternity, comes infinite possibilities. Especially infinite possibilities of spiritual awareness. And this combination of eternity and infinity shows the almost-impossible-to-imagine vastness of the Divine and our soul.

During spirit contact, healing and comfort are common events. When a client has a new and loving way of understanding their husband, wife, father, mother, sister, brother, etc, the lines of spirit communication become filled with messages of Love. This is one of the reasons I find my work as a medium wonderful and fulfilling.

Some of the most uplifting aspects of spirit contact are: the proof of the continuity of Life (survival after so-called Death), spiritual progression is eternal and infinite, and Love never dies but instead grows in amazing abundance!!!